Complicated Life.

The past few days have been the best, most happy days I have had in a while, that was until the yelling started. I live in a house where I am yelled at constantly. As most of you know I am a single mom, but what you don’t know is that I live with my dad, you would think that would be a great thing right? Well it’s not. Ever since my mom passed away on 12/10/2001 I have been the source of his anger, almost as if I am the reason she’s gone. A father is supposed to be a daughters rock, the one man she looks up to, but not here, not in my case mine feels more like a boulder, lose and ready to tumble and crush me until I am submissive and just as miserable as he is. I try to not let the things he says get to me knowing where those words are coming from, but when he starts to take away my happiness away where am I supposed to turn? What am I supposed to do? The only thing I know right now is I need to find a way out.

I’m sorry for the rant, but sadly I just can’t take anymore.

 

Thank you for reading,

 

Have a wonderful night,

 

Stephanie

P.s. If anyone has any suggestions on how to make money online in my off time it would be greatly appreciated. Than you.

Quick hello.

Good morning everyone, I hope you all are having a beautiful Wednesday. My birthday was Sunday and I have to say I have a really good feeling about this year. I know that good things are coming my way as I’m learning to become more self sufficient and tightening my monthly budget a bit. I have also been promoting my online shop etsy.com/shop/loopsandstones like crazy in the hopes of bringing some holiday warmth and holiday cheer to people all over. 

Well I hope you all have a wonderful Wednesday.

Love and hugs from my home to your’s.

Stephanie 🍁 ☕ 🍁 ☕

image

image

image

image

What have I been up to.

image

Hi everyone, my life has been crazy busy with work  working on my etsy shop at etsy.com/shop/loopsandstones and crocheting my life away I haven’t been on much, but I just wanted to stop by and say a quick hello and show you all what I have been up to in the form of pictures.

I will hopefully have another post up soon about other stuff that’s been going on in my life but for now I will leave you all with my life in pictures.

I hope you all have an amazing Monday.

Love and hugs from my home to your’s.

Stephanie 🍁 ☕ 🍁 ☕ 🍁 ☕

image

image

image

image

image

image

image

image

image

image

image

image

image

image

image

I’m open for business!?!?

Good morning everyone, I know it’s been a long time since I last posted but I wanted to let you all know that my shop if finally OPEN.  This has been such a long time coming and I can’t believe it’s finally here. I have been having a lot of ups and downs here lately in life but this has been a major up. The website is etsy.com/shop/loopsandstones I hope you all enjoy my new shop and can find something for that special someone in your life or just for you. 

Thank you all for the amazing words of encouragement.

Stephanie 🍁 ☕ 🍁 ☕ 🍁

image

The ruins.

image

Good afternoon everyone, I hope you are having a great day. My day has been filled with many emotions. Yesterday I confirmed what my gut had told me all along about my ex that he had in fact cheated. Today I am filled with all the questions, why? That’s the biggest one and then all the what if’s start to pour on in. What if I wasn’t so fat? What if I were prettier? What if I made more money? Would he had cheated? But I have to stop myself from the self-destructing thoughts because in the end I know that even if all of those were true he still would have been the same person, and I would still be sitting here in ruins asking the what if’s.
If any of you have been cheated on just know that nothing you change would change the scenario, and that you are fine just the way you are.

Love and hugs from my home to your’s.

Stephanie 🍁 ☕ 🍁 ☕

image

Being a single mommy.

image

Good afternoon everyone, I hope you all  are having an exceptionally wonderful Sunday. Here lately I have had a lot of people ask me how I became and is my son’s dad in his life. The story behind my becoming a single mom is a bit long and complicated, but I will say that my son’s dad was not present at his birth and didn’t come back into our life until little man was 18 months old. From then on we were together for 3 years. For 3 years I had a gut instinct that he was with another woman. I kept telling myself that my gut was wrong, but what was wrong was my heart I didn’t want to believe in my heart that my gut was right. When I found out that my son’s father was not only cheating on me but was also married and had another baby I was crushed. I had dreams of my perfect family, being married, having our own place and in a few minutes all of that was crushed. I found all of this out the day after Christmas of last year and that day I broke it off with him. Since then I haven’t seen or heard from him. It hurt me to think that she has what I was supposed to have, but I know in my heart that I will have better one day. No one deserves to be someone’s second. To answer the other question no he is not in my son’s life anymore and I have to say I am kind of glad he isn’t. I don’t want my son to become like his father because no woman ever deserves this heart ache. He has damaged me physiologically and that damage is going to take a long time to repair but I will repair it.

Well that’s all for now, I hope you all have an amazing weekend.

Love and hugs from my home to your’s.

Stephanie 🍁 ☕ 🍁 ☕

image

image

image

image

image

image

image

The F word! 🙊🙊🙊

image

As I was sitting down last night talking to my dad about the video that has now gone viral, you know the one I’m talking about. No not the one about the fuzzy kittens, the one by Nicole Arbour’s “dear fat people” video. Now I’m not going to go into a rant or even say that I didn’t mind the video, being that I am a bit on the “fat” side I found the video to be a bit eye opening, but what I am here to talk about is something my son said to me when I used the F word. As my dad and I were discussing the video I preceeded to explain to him that even though I am Fat I didn’t find the video offensive, well at that moment my son who was down playing with his cars stood up looked me in the eye and said, “mama don’t ever say that.” “You are not fat, you are beautiful and everyone is different.” “That’s what makes us all who we are.” Now at that point I had tears in my eyes because I couldn’t not believe that someone who has only been on this planet for 5 short years understands more about beauty then most of the world does. It was at that moment that I turned to him and said, “you know what sweetheart?” “You are absolutely right, and don’t ever lose that sight.” It was at that moment that the beauty of the world was open up in front of my eyes by a 5 year old little wonder.

The meaning to this post is that I want you all to know. All of you who are reading this that you are beautiful, no matter your shape, size, color, flaws, or scars. You are all beautiful.

Your true beauty is not what you see in a reflection, but what you possess in your mind. Don’t let that reflection define you.

Love and hugs from my home to your’s.

Stephanie 🍁☕🍁☕

image

For today I’m filled with worry.

image

Today is a day of worry for me, as most of you know my job revolves around cleaning apartments when people move out. Well today I’m worried as I’m working on the last vacant apartment until someone else moves out, which means that my hours may be cut back. I am not a full time employee as it is but to have them cut will be detrimental to my budget. I didn’t expect this last apartment to be so clean when I started. I’m used to messy, messy keeps me working, messy keeps my already tight budget flowing. So today I’m going to set up my shop on etsy in hopes to make up for whatever I may lose. I am thinking about sell not only my crocheted goodies but also my little trinkets of jewelry. I however will keep my faith as I know God will see me through this.

So I’m going to ask that if anyone has any advice on starting an etsy shop it would be very much appreciated.

Love and hugs from my very worried home to your’s.

Stephanie 🍁🌻🍁🌻

image

image

image

image

image

image

Sometimes I think I think too much. 🙇

image

What happens when you’re an over thinker? You go crazy hahaha, not really but over thinking things can open up a whole new world of possibilities. I find myself throughout a given day not day dreaming but thinking. Things like; why did this happen? Or why is this the way it is?

Are you an over thinker? Think about it and let me know.

I hope you all have an amazing Wednesday.

Love and hugs from my home to your’s.

Stephanie 🍁 🍂 🍁 🍂

image

image

image

image

image

Crazy week and feeling like I’m alone.

Sorry I haven’t written in a few days. Not only have I been emotionally drained but my little man starts kindergarten on Thursday. I did take some pictures of him for back to school with my big camera, and I will post those later. Today has been really hard my dad (whom I live with) has been in an extremely bad mood, yelling all day and just being completely negative. I’m getting really tired of this as it happens very often and I just need a new change. I really try to stay as positive as possible and try to keep focused on what I need to do so I can better my son’s and my life. It’s really funny a couple of nights ago I had a dream and in that dream I was at a church with my little guy and we went to get back into the car and I see this homeless man and all of a sudden my dad shows up and scoffs at the homeless gentleman, I then go into the back of the suv and pull out an emergency kit for the man and hand it to him and he starts crying. It was at that moment I woke up and the feeling I had brought tears to my eyes and the only thing I could think is “I need to get closer to god.”

Well enough of my emotional ramblings I’m hoping that the rest of this week is and gets better.

Love and hugs from my home to your’s.

Stephanie 🍁 🍂 🍁 🍂

image

image

image

image

image

image

image

image

image